Our member Cate Campbell was on Woman’s Hour to talk about introducing a new partner to family and friends after the death of a loved one.
The feature was inspired by Mum, the award-winning BBC comedy (pictured above), which features a widow who is worried about how her family will deal with her new partner.
Cate joined widows Colette Jelfs and Barbara Want, and presenter Jenni Murray for the discussion on the BBC Radio 4 programme on Thursday.
She told Woman's Hour, which is available to listen again, it was common for people who have been in a good relationship before the death of their partner to start a new one quickly.
Blessing
“People who have had a good relationship had no baggage, they have no unfinished business,” she said. “They are able to move on with that person they have lost still alive in their hearts.
“Whereas if you have difficulties with a relationship you are still hanging on to the past and regretting that apologies were never made, or nothing was ever settled.
“It’s also possible that couples have talked about the future and the surviving partner may have the blessing of the other one for their future with a new partner.”
Communication
Cate said communication was key to navigating such an emotive thing.
“The interesting thing about the series (Mum) which made it so special and what was so funny was the way that everybody, every single character was struggling with their emotions but not talking about them,” she said.
“The lovely thing about Colette and Barbara is that everybody has been very considered. Everybody has been involved.
“It doesn’t feel as though it’s them going off and starting a new life. They are still involving all of the family, and that is key.”
If you have been affected by any of the issues in this article, you can find a BACP therapist.