Caroline Harber

Availability Monday - Friday 10am - 6pm

all appointments are over zoom at the moment

RELATIONSHIP COUNSELLOR - Individuals and Couples.  I remember when I first thought that counselling might be helpful. I spent a lot of time dipping in and out of various websites getting more and more confused by the various qualifications and types of counselling.   

I eventually chose someone I liked the sound of and went from there.…you’re probably doing the same thing now.  

I tell you this because I believe it’s important that a counsellor has sat in the client’s chair and knows exactly how it feels.  Starting the process of counselling can be empowering and frightening. I understand that and will do everything I can to make it as comfortable for you as possible.  I try to be straightforward without being harsh and encouraging without applying any pressure.  I will be empathetic and non-judgmental.

​I will see couples at the point of breaking up where distress is off the scale, as well as couples who just have a bit or sorting out to do. Relationship work is all about how you fit together as a couple. Without knowing it, we often bring beliefs and assumptions from the families we grew up in and it’s often helpful to examine what both parties bring.  

A lot of relationship issues do not occur overnight. It can sometimes take years of papering over the cracks for significant problems to become apparent. It is a common pattern in relationships when one or other does not talk about hurt feelings and disappointments. This unexpressed hurt can turn into resentment. The next stage is ‘emotional deadening’. In this stage you feel like flat mates rather than intimate partners.

I do a lot of work with affairs and infidelity. Healing is hard. You will need commitment to repairing the damage and rebuilding trust and reconnecting. Forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting, but with belief and desire a relationship can be rebuilt. I have heard many clients say that although what they went through was traumatic, their relationship is stronger and happier than it had ever been.

I remember when I first thought that counselling might be helpful. I spent a lot of time dipping in and out of various websites getting more and more confused by the various qualifications and types of counselling.   

I eventually chose someone I liked the sound of and went from there.…you’re probably doing the same thing now.  

I tell you this because I believe it’s important that a counsellor has sat in the client’s chair and knows exactly how it feels.  Starting the process of counselling can be empowering and frightening. I understand that and will do everything I can to make it as comfortable for you as possible.  I try to be straightforward without being harsh and encouraging without applying any pressure.  I will be empathetic and non-judgmental.