Nicola Wetherell

My general working hours are: 

Monday - Thursday 8.30am-4pm

Sometimes I have flexibility for these and can work around the flexibility of my clients schedules each week. 

I’m Nicky (they/she), an Integrative Counsellor and Somatic Sexologist offering trauma-informed therapy around sexual trauma, sexuality, relationship diversity, intimacy and chemsex.

My integrative approach brings together my Person-Centred counselling degree with my professional training and qualifications in Somatic Sexology and embodied therapeutic work.

I primarily work with sexual trauma survivors, LGBTQIA+ and neurodivergent clients, and people exploring sexuality, gender, relationships, chemsex, grief, shame, boundaries, intimacy and connection with their bodies.

I have a particular interest in grief connected to life transitions and identity change. Coming out, relationships ending or changing, divorce, children growing up, and changes in our bodies, sexuality or identity can involve loss alongside growth. Something can be absolutely right for us and we can still grieve what it changes or what we leave behind.

My work is GSRD (Gender, Sexuality and Relationship Diversity) affirming, sex-positive and rooted in anti-oppressive, evidence-informed practice. There is space to talk openly about sex, kink/BDSM, non-monogamy, sexual identity, desire and sexual trauma, without needing to make yourself or your relationships more conventional or palatable.

My work isn’t about fixing you. Patterns such as shutting down, disconnecting, people-pleasing or struggling to say no often developed as ways of creating safety or maintaining connection.

Sometimes we can understand exactly why something happens and still find ourselves repeating it. Alongside talking, my somatic training allows us to explore what is happening in your body and emotional experience too.

Therapy with me is collaborative. You don’t need to have everything worked out or know where to begin. We can start with what is happening for you now.

I work primarily online across the UK, with occasional in-person sessions in Cranbrook, Kent.

I offer primarily online therapy, giving you the flexibility to attend sessions from your own space wherever you are in the UK. I can also offer occasional in-person sessions in Cranbrook, Kent, particularly where incorporating some types of somatic work may be helpful.

Sessions are collaborative and led by what you bring. Some sessions may involve talking throughout, while at other times we might slow things down and notice what is happening emotionally or within your body. There is no expectation to do somatic work, and you are always in control of what we explore and how.

You might come with something very specific you want to work through, or simply know that something doesn’t feel right. We can work with what is happening now while also exploring the experiences, relationships and protective patterns that may have shaped how you are feeling.

Somatic work can include noticing sensations, emotions, breath, movement, boundaries and nervous-system responses. Where relevant, we may explore embodied consent and your experience of yes, no, maybe and choice. Somatic work does not automatically mean touch or bodywork, and much of it can be explored online. 

I don’t expect you to disclose everything or retell traumatic experiences in detail. Particularly when working with sexual trauma, we can work with how your experiences are affecting you now and move at a pace that feels manageable.

I usually work weekly, particularly at the beginning, as consistency gives us time to build our therapeutic relationship and understand what you need. This can be reviewed as our work develops.

I offer an initial 30 minute consultation so we can talk about what is bringing you to therapy, what you’re looking for and whether working together feels like a good fit.

Before beginning therapy, I offer a free 30 minute consultation. This gives us an opportunity to talk about what is bringing you to therapy, what you’re looking for from our work and whether we feel we may be a good fit.

If you decide you’d like to continue, I’ll send you a short history form and our therapy agreement to read and complete before our first session.

Your first session is the beginning of our therapeutic work and an opportunity for us to start getting to know each other and explore what feels most important to you.

There is no expectation that you disclose your whole history in the first session.

Particularly when working with trauma or experiences that feel difficult to talk about, building trust and a sense of safety within the therapeutic relationship is part of the work. We will move at a pace that feels manageable for you.