Nicola Shaw

We experience many kinds of pain in life and I help people who are in pain. Maybe it’s a pain in your heart from loss, grief, disconnection or difficult relationships. Perhaps it’s the pain of living a life that’s not fulfilling but you’re not sure why. You might find yourself questioning "is this it"? If life hasn't worked out as you thought it would, do you feel empty with the pain of lost dreams and no sense of direction? You may have always had a sense that something isn’t right, but you don’t know what. Maybe the pain of not feeling heard, accepted, appreciated, loved, included or understood is familiar?

You may have experienced a life event or trauma that’s left you feeling lost, unsafe, anxious or hopeless. You can’t remember the last time you felt truly happy. I work with people who feel disillusioned and stuck, some describe feeling trapped or having a hole inside that feels like it can’t be filled.

I’ve spent over two decades working in the health and medical field and I bring a wealth of experience into my work as a psychotherapist. You might have physical pain from a medical diagnosis. Possibly you don’t have a diagnosis or have one you don’t understand. I have lengthy experience of working with addiction, health issues and medically unexplained symptoms- things that are felt in your body that don't seem to get any better no matter what you try.

Life can feel overwhelming sometimes, there’s too many things happening and it’s hard to make sense of it all. Maybe you feel at breaking point from the difficulties you’re having, like life is pointless? Therapy can help to support you and unpack what’s going on. You might get in touch because you want to work together on a specific issue you’re having. If life feels OK you might want the experience of a deeper exploration of why am I this way, what’s happened, why do I do things this way? Whatever the reason you come, I’ll support you to get to know your good qualities as the unique and wonderful person you are! 

I work as an integrative relational psychotherapist drawing upon relational and trauma informed approaches. This involves looking at how early life experiences may be influencing our experience in the here and now. Working together, I’ll help you to find your answers. I’ll support you to find a framework for understanding what might be happening using approaches that are tailored to you.

You may have already tried other things to help. Most of my clients have tried medication, diets, other types of therapy and self-help as a way of managing before coming to see me. I believe that no matter how deep the issue or how long you have struggled, it is possible to find a different way of living. I’ll help you to gain awareness and insight into your patterns of behaviour, thoughts and feelings and find some practical strategies to change the things you choose to.

As human beings we seek connection and want to avoid pain and develop lots of different ways to do this. Disconnection happens in many ways and I believe “what the mind represses, the body expresses.” We can be disconnected from our bodies, our emotional landscape, our true selves, people around us, our wider community and the world. For some it's disconnection from something beyond you as you name it; universal energy, source, God.

The key element of our work is our collaborative relationship. We use the thinking and feeling in the here and now between us to help show what might be happening elsewhere. I use a variety of therapeutic approaches to support our exploration and understanding including Transactional Analysis (TA), Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Internal Family Systems (IFS), Person Centred theory, Somatic practices (working with the body) and creativity. This may include movement, music, story, metaphor and art. I’m also a qualified coach and use NLP, MBIT and motivational techniques in my work. I have a personal and professional interest in consciousness expanding and transpersonal experiences. 

It’s understandable that you might feel nervous about your first session. After all, you’re meeting someone who you’re hoping can help with the things you’re finding difficult. I’ve included some information here so you know a little more about what to expect. My standard session length is 60 minutes and I offer longer sessions where this has been discussed. 

Our first session will be an assessment session for us to get to know each other and explore if we think we can work together effectively. After this you may decide to book a session or you may decide you want to take some time to reflect. Both of these things are OK, it’s important you find a practitioner you feel comfortable with.

Confidentiality is central to our work to feel safe to discuss what you need to without the worry it may be discussed elsewhere. Our first session covers this and the practicalities of working together such as session times, fees, cancellations, and contact between sessions.

At this assessment session I’ll ask for some information from you, how things are in your life at the moment and also find out some more about you and what’s brought you to therapy. We’ll talk about your goals and expectations for therapy and where you might want to be by the end of our time together.

You’ll also be able to find out more about how I work as a therapist and have the opportunity to ask any questions. You’ll be able to experience being in session with me to see if you think we’re a good fit.

I work in collaboration with you to find what helps. Therapy can take commitment and time to get the results you want. I’m not a therapist who offers quick fixes! Whilst you may feel improved after a few sessions I work in a way that supports you to make lasting changes and I usually work long term. I may also ask you to consider additional things alongside therapy to support your wellness.

If you are unsure whether to book an assessment session I offer a free 15 minute telephone consultation prior to booking.