Andrew Thomas

I am a specialist online couple counsellor working with clients across the world who are focussed on working with me to  build a more resilient relationship that recovers and gets stronger. 

For me a quote from one of my past clients sums up my approach to couple work:

"Something Andrew said that has stuck with me, it's about having a good relationship on purpose rather than a bad one by accident."

All sessions are 90 mins long after which I spend at least 30 minutes preparing for the next session and sending follow up emails if appropriate. 

I typically work with people whose openness to new ideas, creativity and hard work has delivered success in their careers. 

Those traits help them get the most out of the tools and concepts that I have developed, which are now being used by couple and individual counsellors across the world in their work with thousands of clients. 

My approach starts by equipping couples with new knowledge and skills. We then apply them to their current issues to achieve a relationship that is healthier and more resilient.

Extensive research shows how the strength of connection with your counsellor and the speed with which it builds contribute to achieving your desired outcomes.

This listing, my website and the first session have been carefully designed to help you sense whether that connection might exist between both of you and me, and the way I work.

The tools and concepts I share are focussed on transforming my clients' issues from being problems to be overcome into a resource on which to build and sustain a healthy relationship.

This places an emphasis on both the quality of the sessions (my responsibility) and what happens between them (your responsibility). I focus on creating a learning cycle with both of you that extends beyond the end of our work together.

Choosing the right couple counsellor for both of you is probably one of the most important decisions you have to make at this point in your lives. I want you to have as much information as possible before you commit time and money on the person you choose to work with.

That is why the first session, with me, is only paid for if you choose to continue. In this way you get a real experience of what it is like working with me both in terms of style and content.

My clients typically work with me for between 12 and 18 sessions.

The session-by-session guide below may vary according to the needs of each couple, but the main elements are consistent. 

Session 1: 

We do two things:

• You each answer the following question: If it were our last session and we were talking about the ways in which your relationship had changed what would you hope to say?

• You learn how to use the Rainbow Map tool to develop your Reflective Mind and Reactive Brain/Body self-awareness which provides a foundation for the rest of our work together.

Homework: Use the Rainbow Map and learn more about the jargon free Reflective Mind and Reactive Brain/Body model on which it is based.  

Session 2

We review the Reflective Mind and Reactive Brain/Body model, how your self-awareness is progressing and fine tune your Rainbow Maps.

Following that we will develop what is called a Genogram that describes your family structure and provides more information on which existing resources can be refined and new ones developed.

Your homework will be to read a short piece on resources and reconditioning and continue to improve your Reflective Mind and Reactive Brain/Body self-awareness.

Session 3

We review how your self-awareness is progressing. It is not uncommon for clients to start experimenting with resource refinement and generation by this time.

Sessions 4-6

A careful progression from less to more sensitive issues based on your heightened capacity for self-awareness, resource generation and activation.

Review your original Best Hopes from the first session to refine and add to them based on the relationship orientated conversations you are having during and between sessions.

If some issues are proving to be harder to resolve, we would discuss whether engaging in the Legacy Behaviour Experience might be helpful. This typically adds three to six additional sessions to the work we do together.

Sessions 7-12

Moving towards one session a month and then once every three months before ending our work together. These sessions focus on how your self-awareness, resources and outcomes cycle can be fine-tuned and become an ingrained aspect of your relationship.